Sunday, March 25, 2012

Tanka - FGC (2012) #7

I see you near me 
I imagined us always 
ageing together
walking, tears smear my glasses
I dance alone now you’re gone


This was written in response to Write Anything's Form and Genre Challenge ,  Tanka style  

These poems are frequently about love, seasons, sadness, with strong images and poetic devices haiku avoids. 5 lines, with lines 1 and 3 being shorter. 
Syllables per line are 5-7-5-7-7 respectively. -- defintion from "Poet's Market, 1998"  

From my reading too, I believe they normally don't give them a title - thus no title on mine.  

I'd call it - "Mortem Viits"... "Death Visits"...I love the way Latin sounds.

This was submitted for #7 of FGC. 

This  was also submitted to Friday Flash.


Kate Sherrod said...

This almost made me cry. Well felt and well done, Annie!

Storm Dweller said...

Heartbreak. Is there any stronger emotion? Perhaps only love.

Unknown said...

thanks Kate and Storm! I appreciate your feedback. was so much more that I wanted to put in there.. but words.. syllables so precious.

Carolyn Wagner-Writer said...

Very sad. Beautifully written.

Barbara @ de rebus said...

Oh! Wonderful! The images of a couple aging together and your final line-- "I dance alone now you’re gone"--are impactful!

Paul said...

Very moving and evocative.